touch of evil

We watched Touch of Evil last night. O boy. It could also have been called
Touch of Ridiculousness Having Charlton Heston Playing a Mexican

Touch of Orson Looking Even Worse Than Usual

Touch of Nordic Prostitutes Working -- Inexplicably -- in a Mexican Border Town (Zsa Zsa Gabor *and* Marlene Dietrich)

Touch of Janet Leigh Being Weirdly Sexy Again

Touch of a Mexican Crime Family Looking Laughably Like High School Greasers

Touch of Female Members of Mexican Crime Family Looking Like Extras In A Joan Jett Video

Touch of Villain Not Being Very Scary or Even Villainous Due to Being Overweight, Limping and Using a Cane

Touch of Entire Movie Just Being Another Excuse for Orson to Show Off Fancy Camerawork
And so on. Also, not only were there no apes on horseback, but at no point was *anyone* even referred to as a damned dirty ape.


  1. hehe-fabulous as always dj! a few things that ran through my mind as i read your comments~
    -sounds/looks a lot like "Giant"(dark haired and dark skinned 'white folks' being the blonde haired, white skinned white folks, but don't tell them that they look anything like that 'mexicans' in the movie~hello elizabeth taylor and rock hudson-ah yikers, carry grant?)
    -waiting in line as little student in london to get the "good seats" right up front at "phantom of the opera"(now you shush!). so, this phantom is disfigured, but us ladies are supposed to be all "ga-ga" about him because that mask/cape/voice combination is hot stuff, plus he is uber fit(more hot stuff) from swinging around the theatre like tarzan. well, our london phantom had the voice and cape, but my twin and i could not stuff busting out in fits of loud and horrific laughing-especially during the very quiet scenes. why? our phantom had quite the beer belly on him which just through the whole show away. we couldn't stop seeing the john lebos(?) snl character, "master thesbian" character prancing around with his cape as if he was mocking the whole show. oh, that was so good!
    -finally, seeing an ex boyfriend(yes, freakishly tall like you) who does have the mask/voice/cape/buff combo be his own version of the phantom on broadway(fantastic reviews to boot!) 2 years ago! wowza-who knew? again, we couldn't stop laughing because to us, this was just our funny, silly guy that we knew when we were 19 who smelled like the beer soaked carpet of his icky frat. turnips...


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