optimiser; india ink on math paper.
Grocery shopping on a rainy night after nine o'clock? A pleasure. Just me, the deviants and the mental defectives. We all know each other, or at least enough to skip any aisle with other 'human' traffic in it (only one person can comfortably talk to themselves in any twenty-foot radius at a time). No line ups at the one open till but nothing's moving fast anyway; the girl working is either new or deranged (her name tag reads "Harry Potter"). Plenty of time to take in the tabloids and the semi-gloss magazines (one night, actually, I got quite depressed by an US magazine story about a sad and suicidal Rick Springfield ... he looked like someone wearing a Rick Springfield mask). Vanity Fair tells me that Cher is 'back'. Really? Why is this happening? Is someone *making* her come back? And where is she expected to arrive, looking all pinched like that?
The woman is 64 years old.
Of course I could send C grocery shopping, so she could be baffled by this stuff, but she only comes back with Merlot and retro t-shirts and new cat collars. And those are hard to chew.
Skipped writing group last night. I know. But I'm *busy*, and we're approaching stupid season (is this all we do now, just lurch from one holiday to the next?), and I need to prioritize my hustle. Besides, I'd already spent all day mocking up covers for the Ban Righ anthology. Have I mentioned how much I hate graphic design? I hate graphic design. Honestly, a job fit only for abnormals and the seriously unsound.
Anyway, I needed a few hours at the studio.
While I was there I picked out a little canvas that C has asked me to donate to a certain charity. I was reluctant, at first, because last time it was all sweetness and light until they (an entirely different 'they', but I'm lumping them all together now) got what they wanted, and after that not even a tax receipt or a parting kiss. And that's a place I call Bullshitistan. But C assures me that this bunch will be different. We'll see ...
What is it, anyway, that only makes art desirable in a charitable situation? Please, tell me the excuses, so I can tell you, in turn, how cheap they are.
* * * * *
Grocery shopping on a rainy night after nine o'clock? A pleasure. Just me, the deviants and the mental defectives. We all know each other, or at least enough to skip any aisle with other 'human' traffic in it (only one person can comfortably talk to themselves in any twenty-foot radius at a time). No line ups at the one open till but nothing's moving fast anyway; the girl working is either new or deranged (her name tag reads "Harry Potter"). Plenty of time to take in the tabloids and the semi-gloss magazines (one night, actually, I got quite depressed by an US magazine story about a sad and suicidal Rick Springfield ... he looked like someone wearing a Rick Springfield mask). Vanity Fair tells me that Cher is 'back'. Really? Why is this happening? Is someone *making* her come back? And where is she expected to arrive, looking all pinched like that?
The woman is 64 years old.
Of course I could send C grocery shopping, so she could be baffled by this stuff, but she only comes back with Merlot and retro t-shirts and new cat collars. And those are hard to chew.
* * * * *
Skipped writing group last night. I know. But I'm *busy*, and we're approaching stupid season (is this all we do now, just lurch from one holiday to the next?), and I need to prioritize my hustle. Besides, I'd already spent all day mocking up covers for the Ban Righ anthology. Have I mentioned how much I hate graphic design? I hate graphic design. Honestly, a job fit only for abnormals and the seriously unsound.
Anyway, I needed a few hours at the studio.
While I was there I picked out a little canvas that C has asked me to donate to a certain charity. I was reluctant, at first, because last time it was all sweetness and light until they (an entirely different 'they', but I'm lumping them all together now) got what they wanted, and after that not even a tax receipt or a parting kiss. And that's a place I call Bullshitistan. But C assures me that this bunch will be different. We'll see ...
What is it, anyway, that only makes art desirable in a charitable situation? Please, tell me the excuses, so I can tell you, in turn, how cheap they are.
Try doing your shopping on a Monday morning. That's what I had to do this week. The hubby normally does it (because I hate it more than you hate graphic design). Coupon Mamas shop on Mondays. They are efficient and serious. They never talk to themselves.
ReplyDeleteI recently donated a piece to be auctioned off for the benefit of education. I don't know if the damn thing sold or not. Seriously, if someone is going to ask me to give them something for free, they better be willing to fawn over me until I can't stand it anymore.
loved the shopping bit - I use to stop late at night on my way home from rehearsal - a whole different world - the night people - very similar to the people who take the last ferry out of town from Seattle - even the guys directing people onto the ferry - during the day they are all business, standing tall, pointing you here or there and using that constant move forward hand motion - the guys early in the morning just stand there and you kinda pick your own way onto the boat - I quit donating - :)
ReplyDeleteI have a wonderful spouse who does our shopping...he's one of those people other people get happy just being around. On rare occasions when I've gone to the grocery store with him, I marvel at the smiles and nods of recognition from department managers, cashiers, clerks, and even other shoppers. It's a special talent, being nice.
ReplyDeleteRecently when asked by charitable organization to donate something to a fund-raising auction, a friend offered a mirror in a wooden frame, hand-carved with her intricate Celtic knot designs. She was given the impression that vouchers for 'dinner for four' or tickets to a 'blockbuster movie' were more what the organizers wanted.
shopping at night is a common occurrence for me and well, i guess i fit in more. plus during the day i always run into people i know and i hate that more than shopping itself.
ReplyDeletecharity art. i get torn now with it as i never see my dentist offering a free cleanings at the various silent auctions nor the pharmacy a free prescription .. makes me suspicious that they know something we artists dont.
my grocery store plays the best music after 9pm and that alone makes it worth my while. usually my husband shops because i tend to bring home only snack foods, and i only wish vintage tees were available for purchase there.
ReplyDeletecharity and art: i don't know. no one ever asks me for anything. wah.
i am, btw, in the very middle of your short story collection and i am loving it largely. thank you. i will be posting about the experience when i'm finished haing it :)
"hate graphic design, a job fit only for abnormals and the seriously unsound. "
ReplyDelete:D hahaha, sometimes i wonder how do they do it, cos i suck at it, and my drawings are silly.
but at least im normal :D
you are so funny.
Our local mini supermarket thing shuts at 11 but from 10 they knock all the pastries down to 10p. I find myself there not infrequently, frothing at the mouth. I've noticed a few normals in there too, though they never win any of the discount treats. Nice guys finish last!
ReplyDelete